Remembering Lori Nuss

Sometimes you get news that for the life of you does not make sense, nor is it fair. We are often told that life is not fair.

Though we tell ourselves to overcome any obstacle we encounter, well, it’s true, sometimes life is not fair.

I was scrolling through my Facebook page last Sunday morning and I see a picture of Lori Nuss shared by her sister-in-law, Holly Nuss. I never met Holly but got to know Lori well. Since I am Facebook friends with Lori, any picture that has her tagged will show up on my news feed. The picture contained information that Lori died on Sunday. I felt heartbroken the rest of the day and remain so today. Her obituary was released in the Napa Valley Register on Friday. Causes of death were not revealed but that’s immaterial. I get that we have no choice when our time comes but 59 is way too soon to be gone. In fact, I remember posting a Happy Birthday message on her Facebook page no more than a few days earlier.

In my ten years as a sports reporter in the Northern part of Napa Valley, CA, for the St. Helena Star and Weekly Calistogan, I had a chance to get to know many families. I miss that part of the job more so than covering games. Being a sports reporter in a small town lends itself to developing relationships. That dynamic can be a plus or a minus. The plus side is that those relationships can often result in friendships. Though I am no longer in the newspaper industry, I have kept in touch with many people from that time in my life.

The relationships in small towns can also be claustrophobic, so much so that while it is necessary to establish good relationships with parents, sometimes you have to keep them at arm’s length. However, when you meet one you have a great relationship with, you treat them like gold. In my world, Lori was gold.

I arrived on the Upvalley beat to cover St. Helena and Calistoga in January 2004. The Nuss family was one of the first ones I met as both of their sons wrestled for St. Helena High. Tim graduated in 2004 followed by Tyler in 2007. Tim qualified for the CIF State Meet during his senior year. Both of her sons were part of the glory years of Saints wrestling, during which time the team won 10 league titles in 11 years and a CIF North Coast Section Class A title in 2006 under former head coach Herschel Sandler.

High school wrestling tournaments are often all day affairs, mostly on Saturday, with a lot of down-time between matches. During that down-time were many conversations with kids, coaches, fellow media members and parents. Lori and Brian Nuss along with John and Lisa Montelli, whose son Tony graduated with Tyler in 2007 and was also a Saints wrestler, were regulars who showed up to meets near and far to support their sons. I had so many conversations with all four that I consider them friends. It did not qualify as a friendship as far as getting together socially because after all, we have our family lives. It was the type of friendship that when you see each other, there is an instant bond.

The Nuss family owned and operated a small family-owned winery, Vinoce Vineyards. After their sons graduated, I only saw them sporadically but when I did, the conversations were just like old times.

What I remember most about Lori’s personality was that she a perfect mix of New Jersey spit fire and sassiness along with a loving heart. Translation, she could cuss like a sailor and love like a saint.

Lori, though I’m in no hurry to get where you are going, I know we’ll meet again someday.